A Meaningless Re-do

A MEANINGLESS RE-DO

It never would have happened if my husband had not insisted that we must cooperate.

What was the problem?

His and Her Wedding Rings

Our Pastor had decided to have a day to honor marriages. No problem there. I’m fully in favor of celebrating commitment.

I was fine until I heard the plan for ending the service.

Not only was the pastor going to ask all married couples in the audience to stand, he was going to call the staff to the platform. We would all repeat our vows after him.

There was the problem.

I said, “I love you, Honey, but I can’t do it.”

He said, “I know you love me, but we have to do this.”

“Maybe I can be gone that Sunday,” I said, knowing full well I would be there. I thought I’d probably feel worse as a deserter than a target on stage.

Daily routines kept me busy. I tried to forget that Sunday was coming. I usually enjoyed going to church because the people were very friendly and accepting.

Make a List -- Get It Done

Working with this pastor and his wife was a joy to me, too. But I couldn’t ask to be excused because of loyalty to my husband.

The dreaded Sunday arrived. As planned, the pastor concluded his sermon and called the staff forward.  On the platform, as we faced each other, my husband quietly said, “We’ll be OK.”

I had always said, “I meant my vows the first time and I don’t ever intend to repeat them.” I strongly felt that for me it would take something precious away from the original.

As we started to repeat the vows, I started crying. How embarrassing!

I was happy in my marriage, but what would people think? I was thankful my husband kindly escorted me off stage. I wished I could disappear.

My father-in-law saved the day. As I tried to slip out the back door he said, “Well, Dar, it was just like the first time.”  He smiled and laid a hand on my shoulder. What a relief. I knew Dad understood and life could go on.

Love and Understanding Help A Day Go Better

No one ever mentioned my tears, not even the pastor. And I’ve never again been asked to repeat my vows. I’d have to be true to myself and refuse.

I'm sure my husband would agree for a couple of reasons: 1) It would be nice to avoid another embarrassing moment, and 2) he knows repeating my vows would be, for me, a meaningless re-do.

Any couple choosing to repeat their vows has my full support. We all need to be free to choose what means the most to us.

Solomon had some good advice: When you make a vow to God, do not delay to pay it (keep your word) . . . Better not to vow than to vow and not pay. (Ecclesiastes 5:4-5 NKJV).

It doesn’t matter if it’s the first time around, or a re-do.