Whatever Happened to MYOB?

Social media is a convenient source of communication. I have friends who enjoy using Facebook and Twitter, while I have stuck with emails and texts.

When I hear some of the negative responses to media postings, I'm amazed. I always think for civilized people we’re not very civil.        

Civil is not just a term for municipal government. It can also be used in the sense of being polite, courteous, or refined.

I recently saw a posting of Candace Cameron Burre’s family Christmas photo. That was followed by several postings about the vitriolic comments made by complete strangers. I thought whatever happened to MYOB?

When I was growing up, I was told more than once, “Mind Your Own Business!” I needed that. It was part of learning how to be civil---learning when my opinion was to be given and when it was not.

I have friends who are heavily into social media. From what I hear, Ms. Burre’s family experience is not unusual. My view is that we have a faceless communication tool that people use to say things they would never say face-to-face.

Malice seems to be rampant in responses to even the simplest of postings. Words are full of spite, animosity, and viciousness. There's not a hint of kindness, benevolence, or goodness of any kind.

Slander is another term that describes some responses. These are words that vilify, revile, attack or belittle what has been said.  

Remember the question how do you eat an elephant? The answer: One bite at a time. The elephant in the room is the hurtful negativity of social media. Can it be eliminated? I doubt it. Can it be improved? I think so.

Consider Solomon’s wise advice: Joy comes in giving an apt reply, and a timely word is so good (Proverbs 15:23 NIV).  

The Message puts it this way: Congenial conversation---what a pleasure! The right word at the right time---beautiful!

Your words matter. Happy posting!

 

  

Love is Not Always a Feeling

Love is a tricky word. Our first reaction is usually emotional. Our heart seems to beat a little faster when the one we love comes near. We smile without realizing it. Our eyes meet and we feel very special.

Emotional love is important in human relationships. Romantic love is what propels a bride and groom down the aisle. Babies have a way of sparking love in the hearts of parents and the broader family unit.

In the world of humans, love is a two-sided relationship. Not even a friendship will flourish without this element.    

But we all know emotional love has a way of running down, leaking out, or reaching a limit. When this happens, people feel let down or disappointed. Having “lost heart,” they think it must be time to get out of this relationship . . . but it’s not!

Love is not always a feeling! Instead of depending on emotions, true love is a choice. It shows up in a willingness to act for the good of another.

I said I would share a “boots on the ground” explanation of love this week. I grew up with the King James Version (KJV) of the Bible, but there are now many wonderful easier-to-understand versions.

First Corinthians Thirteen is known as “The Love Chapter.” Feel free to read it in any Bible you like. I’m going to share a few choice things from the *Amplified Bible (AMP).

Sixteen characteristics of love are listed in verses four through eight. Let's consider a few:

                      Love endures long, and is patient and kind

                      Love is never envious nor boils over with jealousy

                      Love is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly

                      Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or own way

                      Love is not self-seeking, touchy or fretful, or resentful

                      Love does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness

                      Love never fails (never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end)

Stop and review that list.

It shows how the emotion-driven “I LOVE you,” can become a choice-driven action that says, “I care about YOU!”

True love in ALL relationships balances emotions with actions. We need both.

*The Amplified Bible I Use is THE EVERYDAY LIFE BIBLE featuring Notes and Commentary by Joyce Meyer, Faith Words, Hachette Book Group, New York, NY, 2006. 

Burden Bearers

Do those two words remind you of pack mules or camels? Such animals have been valuable for centuries, but humans also have a burden-bearing capacity.

Bearing a burden means being helpful in some way. Sometimes you are required to do the heavy lifting. Other times your help is needed to bear up under emotional stress.

While fighting cancer in 2007 I had many burden bearers. The closest one was my husband. He drove hundreds of miles that year between our home and the city where I had to be for treatments. I'm still grateful for his help. The year was filled with doctor appointments, chemo, surgery, radiation, labs, and scans.

What is a burden? My dictionary says it's anything hard to bear or put up with. Not all human burdens are physical. Some are emotional. Right now, isolation is creating a burden for many, as well as a loss of jobs and a lack of finances. And death always creates burdens for those left behind.

The Apostle Paul instructed believers to bear (endure or carry) other people's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ (Galatians 6:2). So, what did Jesus say about that?

It's really quite clear in John 15:12-13: This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, to lay down one's life for his friends.

Love is a tricky word. Our first reaction is generally emotional. But my husband often acted out of love, not as a feeling, but for the good of another.

Next week I'll share the "boots on the ground" explanation of love expressed in First Corinthians, chapter thirteen. Meanwhile, what are you doing to help bear someone's burdens?

Practical help may include giving a ride when needed. Other help may include providing a meal to meet dietary needs, calling with a word of encouragement, or sending a card or text. Donations to burden-bearing organizations help, too.

There are many ways to be a burden bearer. The important thing is to do it, not just think about it.